So who would have thought following God's plan would be so difficult.
Im really struggling with letting God take control of my life. its so hard for me to just let everything go and say "here you go, all these problems are yours now".
any suggestions?
Its been a stressful month.
Getting ready for a wedding is not fun. Once again, if i was in control, planning the wedding would be soooo much easier. However, i am not the wedding planner, bride nor the groom. So i have no control over anything! ugh.
but im really excited for the wedding! its the second wedding ill be going to this year. everyones getting married and having babies. i want to get married and have babies!! all this wedding talk and planning is making me want to get married!
but im pretty far from that point. i cant even get the guy to want to hang out with me... sigh. i hate this no title but were commited kind of relationship. it leaves me confused. one day were super good and then a few days later its like i mean nothing to him. when things get good between us he turns right around and runs the other direction. Even at the slight mention of being bf and gf again he's out the door. and to believe that im stupid enough to still wait. gosh, im such an idiot. but at the same time i cant just up and leave. i really want this realtionship to work out. but im so over playing this "game". sigh. kill me now!!!!
i got an interview with the credit dept at my job. so im super excited. please pray that this is something in God's plan and that ill move up the corporate ladder. though i dont want to stay with this company forever. i rather be at a desk then dealing with upset, cenial contractors and painters. CRAP. i have to go to work. didnt realize the time. write more later. :]
